I Always Cry at Weedings

I’ve edited many, many books that include wedding scenes, and it is very rare to get through such a scene without running across at least one typo that is, well, funny. I’ve kept a list of my favorites over the years, and I finally have enough funny typos to write my very own wedding story. Here goes.

At last, Britney’s weeding day had arrived. She was all aflutter and atwitter, not knowing if she would get through the cerealmony without throwing up. Soon she would be weeded to the man of her dreams! She only hopped she would remember the special voles she had written. At the church, Britney walked down the isle on her father’s strong arm as the flower girl tossed flower pedals on the ground before them. There, in the alter area, stood Bobby, her husband-to-be. He was so handsome in his tuxedo with tales and his clumber bun. He smiled brightly, watching the approach of his beautiful bribe. Then, before the alter, they recited their weeding vowels, “A, e, i, o, u, and sometimes y,” and then they kissed while the quests clapped in applause.

I’m quite proud of my little story, especially that bit about the “alter area” and “before the alter.” Some people (i.e., men) might even tell you that “alter” is not a typo. And I’m pretty sure “A, e, i, o, u, and sometimes y” could catch on as a hip, modern addition to “love, honor, and obey,” especially among English majors.

Oh, and if your response to my little wedding story was one of confusion and “What typos? I didn’t see any typos,” you should really hire me, because I am a professional and I know just how to help you.