The Editor vs. Blueberry Pancakes

I have learned an important lesson this morning: Blueberry pancakes are not brain food. They smell heavenly and taste delicious, but once they’re in your stomach they sit there like a lump, releasing a steady dose of pancake molecules whose sole mission is to put brain cells (and editors) to sleep. Coffee will not save you, no matter how many cups you drink.

Yes, I learned this the hard way. Early this morning I headed off to the local Bob Evans to treat myself to a yummy breakfast of something other than hot five-grain cereal with walnuts and dried cranberries (my usual at home—excellent brain food, by the way). I was feeling daring (a bad sign) and ordered pancakes instead of boring old scrambled eggs and home fries with wheat toast.

What does my breakfast have to do with editing? Everything. Nearly three hours after I ate, my stomach still feels heavy, and so does my brain. Here’s a very important message for all you young editors out there: You need your brain. An editing brain should be quick and agile, not plodding and sleepy. Editing with a heavy, pancake-sodden brain is not fun. Just trust me on this. I have sacrificed my own brain for your benefit.

So, please learn from my mistake. Forgive me for sounding like your mother, but make sure you eat a good breakfast every day. I recommend hot cereal with nuts and fruit, coffee or tea in moderation, maybe some eggs once in a while. Just say no to blueberry pancakes (or doughnuts, or other sweet and doughy things), no matter how they tempt you. Your whole body will thank you.

Now, when can I take a nap?